Making up one's mind

This is the deal -  I've made up my mind to shop alternatively every month.

Sticking with the 6 month ban seems too hard a work to me. :( :( This shows how much less self restraint I have on myself - Not goood at all !! :( :'(

So- here's the deal - shop one month , ban one month, and the vicious circle!

I am definitely going to stick to this agenda.

OK ! so..

Alright - so I've crossed 20 straight days without buying anything!!!!!!!!!!!! Hurraayyyy :)

I admit it took a lot of resistance on my part as well as the guilt of buying after having written about the ban so very thoughtfully.. This blog actually has made me restrain from buying, how rad is that?

Yes, if you were wondering how.. I am guilty like that!

This blog actually grounds me and puts a string on my finger restraining me from online shopping - a great achievement, considering even after loads of times my bf has advised me not to buy something i really think i need, but only a mere 'want' out of pure lust for the product! So.. the blog deserves respect and it will keep getting it till i achieve my target (just to refresh your memory- I have taken an oath (?!) to ban online shopping for 6 months, starting this September).

I hope i keep this up for next 3 months atleast, if not for 6 months..

Coming to think of it, growing up I've not bought stuff for myself months on end without feeling the urge to spend.. how can a person change so drastically from being like that to this? Good question to ponder over..

Till I see you next, folks, ta ta from me..

Thanks for reading.. this is almost like writing on stone! Words that I write here are straight from my heart. Feels gooood :)

Too Many Things ..

Too many things happening in my life, right now..

Some, I dont even know how to react and head toward.

Some, I just do not want to think about.

Some, I am soo grateful to God (if there's one), for

Some, I just feel life's throwing odd balls at me from all directions - and am just too dazed to see the clear picture amongst the fog.

I want to cry, I also want to laugh and hug the people I care about & love, I also want to do some crazy stuff (which might even mean I am wondering why I am still on this earth for!).

If you notice the above sentence carefully, you might have come across many 'WANTS' but absolutely no 'NEEDS' , whatsoever.

Sounds confusing?

Yea, that's the state of my mind at this very moment. Totally zoned out and confused and clueless....

Is there a way out of this emptiness? I just hope so. Might happen / Might not happen .. 
Some people say we need to take life as a challenge and have a 'bring it on' attitude, but I find it tough to be that way at all times.

Just hoping for the heavy wind to settle down and a soothing breeze would be a welcome change.

Wishes & Hopes ! I find them never ending. What about you? Would love to hear other takes on this.

Day 2 of the Ban

Man !! This shopping ban is taking a toll on me! kidding, not! :(

Its just Day2 into the ban and am already feeling terrible.

This is just to make me realize how bad i've been these past few months . Sob - where is my money going!!?*^&% So, thats where! Gotcha!

Speaking of the 1st day into the ban - i.e yesterday, it was so damn tough and had me resisting the urge from not going to the net banking page navigating from the checkout of a particular very tempting online shopping store !
You see, I had really really wanted to get a pair of blank thong slippers for a long time and the one that i got recently (read:1 month back <insert sly smiley>) has worn out, already!
I spotted this and since I already had money on my cash-back account in the above mentioned website, thought 'Why not' ?

Then, it hit me - of all things - I started the ban today ! Holy cow ! I so had to stick on to it - after what I had written on the blog yesterday ! yessss...some self control, i had to persist myself.

I am having some sense of renewal - I know I can do it - for example, today am feeling a lot fresher - concentrating on more important work, which was actually a bit difficult yesterday.

If this is how am gonna feel, then all I can say is 'bring it on' .

Challenge, am ready for you!